“Why am I always anxious for no reason?”
Now that is a very good question - and one I get asked quite a lot as a therapist who specializes in anxiety. And, the answer might not be what you’d think.
The truth is - chronic anxiety does have a reason
For those of us who spend a great deal of time living with anxiety, it can often seem like there are times that we know exactly why we are anxious, and other times when it appears that there is actually no reason at all. And in our logical brains, that is sometimes the best interpretation we can come up with. The truth is - while you might think you’re feeling anxious for no reason - your body always has a reason. What’s challenging for most of us is how to fix something when we don’t understand the cause.
Your body wants to keep you safe
The beautiful (and complicated) thing about the human brain is that it is very good at gathering information. In fact, there are parts of your brain (your amygdala and other friends) whose ‘one job’ is constantly searching your environment for possible threats to you. And, in that way - it’s a great protector!
Sometimes, we completely understand what our protector parts are telling us because we can logically understand them - like when we suddenly feel anxious before standing up to give a presentation at work, or during a hard conversation with a partner, or while waiting for test results. Other times, our brain is noticing something that isn’t quite as cognitive - meaning it’s picking up on a tone, word, smell, or other sensory input that reminds it of time in the past where that thing = danger.
When that happens, our brain goes into immediate action, flooding our system with brain chemicals and giving us signals that we should be careful. Those signals can show up in our bodies in many different ways - like increased heart rate, changes in breathing, stomach aches, dizziness or fogginess, a lump in the throat - and all of these signals are meant to call our attention to our environment. It’s our body’s way of calling for change so that it can feel more safe.
You can make small adjustments any time to help your brain
When we’ve had this ^ stuff (sensory triggers, searching for safety) going on for a while, it can sometimes feel impossible to make a shift. And if I’m being honest, it’s certainly not “quick and easy” to change the whole of your anxiety in a few minutes or even overnight. What CAN be quick and easy, however, are the small techniques that can serve as building blocks to greater change over time.
Now, I’m fully aware that these are things you’ve probably ready in many other places on the internet. And maybe you’ve tried them but they didn’t stick, or maybe (like me before I really understood how and why these things work) you thought “oh yeah sure, breathing is really gonna help my anxiety”.
So first, as I always tell my clients, I would never suggest a technique to anyone that I haven’t tried myself. Secondly, when you use these techniques, know that you’re sending sensory signals to your brain to tell it that you are in fact in a safe environment and there is no immediate threat. There’s a bunch of fancy neuroscience around how and why that is (which we’ll definitely chat about in another post), but for now just remember that when you’re able to slow down, you’re showing your brain that safety is possible, and that you have more ability to calm your body than your anxiety wants you to believe - these exercises are one way to do just that.
Tips for calming anxiety
Give yourself a butterfly hug: Cross your arms across your chest, with your fingers on each shoulder. Tap gently 2 or 3 times on each shoulder and then repeat on the other side. Go back and forth for a few minutes. This technique requires you to use both sides of your brain, which helps you retain your “logical thinking” even when sensory triggers want to take over.
Ground into your environment: Another way to engage both sides of your brain together is by looking for sensory input in your environment to stay present. You can do this in many way, but one of my favorites is to look around and state out loud or in your head all the colors you see.
Extend your exhale: Choose a comfortable number to count to as you breathe in, and then add 2 or 3 to that number to count to as you breathe out. Some people find that breathing in to a count of 4 and out to a count of 6 or 7 works well for them. Extending your exhale triggers the “rest and digest” part of your autonomic nervous system, which sends calming signals throughout your body.
Anxiety can be healed
It may feel surprising, but the truth is that anxiety is trying to help, not hurt, and learning how to respond to your anxiety is how we begin to create change. Starting with small techniques can create building blocks that can help begin to shift patterns in the brain and start out on a path to reducing anxiety. It takes time, effort, and dedication, but working through anxiety and coming to a new normal of more calm is possible.
Some people find that they’re largely able to manage their anxiety on their own, and others may find the support of a therapist to be integral to their healing. Therapy can not only teach you more techniques likes those I’ve shared above, but can also help you feel less alone in your anxiety, and understand more about the roots of your individual anxiety.
If you’re wondering what anxiety treatment with me might look like (and you’re located in DE or PA), reach out today or book a free consult call to get started on the path to reducing your anxiety today.
The content on this blog is for educational and informational purposes only. Reading these posts does not create a therapeutic relationship with me, and the information provided is not a substitute for personalized therapy or professional medical advice. If you are experiencing a mental health crisis or emergency, please call 911, your local crisis line, or seek help from a licensed professional. The strategies and examples shared here are general in nature and may not be right for everyone—working with a licensed therapist provides individualized support tailored to your needs.
